So Difficult
by reviewgirl911
Summary: Dear Old Love series Prompt: It's so difficult for you that you think it's easy for everyone else. Ginny dies after giving birth to Lily, and Harry is left a single father floundering in his own grief, shutting out concerned family and friends. It takes Luna's words to spring him back to reality.


**Hey! So this is a one-shot that is part of a series of prompts I'm doing called Dear Old Love. Basically, my requirement is that the prompt is incorporated somewhere in the story. Hope you enjoy! Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the Dear Old Love book/blog. I'm just a major fan!**

**Prompt**: It's so difficult for you that you think it's easy for everyone else.

Luna Lovegood walked towards the Potter cottage slowly, her eyes taking in the sight. She had always like this house, and seeing it glow in the moonlight made her toes tingle. It could've been the Nargles, but they usually weren't out this late. The porch light was on, indicating that Harry was still awake. Luna wasn't surprised. She didn't think he had really slept since Ginny had been admitted to the hospital.

Harry and Ginny had gotten married two years after she had graduated Hogwarts. The wedding had been small and intimate, though many had badgered them to have a huge extravagant wedding (mainly Mrs. Weasley). Luna had served as Ginny's maid of honor, Ron the best man, Teddy the ring bearer, and Victoire Weasley the flower girl. Ginny played professional Quidditch for four years before quitting to have little Jamie. Albus followed two years later. Ginny had started to cover Quidditch for the Daily Prophet (sadly, Luna could not convince her father to cover sports) while Harry continued to rise up the ranks in the Auror department. Neither wanted a giant family, but both longed for a daughter, and so when Ginny got pregnant for the third time the couple was happy.

Sadly, this pregnancy had many complications. Ginny ended up in the hospital for most of it, her blood pressure violently fluctuating. Despite the healer's advice and her husband's pleads, Ginny refused to have a C-section before she was full-term. By that time, Ginny was so weak and unstable that there was nothing the healers could do to save her. Their daughter, Lily, was born perfectly healthily, but Ginny did not come out of the operating room. On May 1, 2008, Harry Potter became a widower with three children under the age of 5.

That had been two months ago, and everyone who cared about Harry was starting to get seriously worried. Harry had taken an indefinite leave of absence from his job, something everyone more than understood, but no one had actually seen him since the funeral. Hermione had stopped by his house a few times, and while the children were fine and being cared for, she had not seen Harry. Kreacher had croaked, "Master not want to be disturbed" and was very stingy in what information he would provide but did admit that his master wasn't eating or sleeping much, only coming out of his room to take care of his kids or have a drink. Owls were sent and not answered, and the Floo was locked down. Everyone wanted to help, to offer comfort, but Harry did not want any.

The family decided that someone needed to go talk to Harry. After careful consideration, Luna was selected. Seeing one of the Weasleys might upset him, and a pregnant Hermione would also stir up bad memories. Luna was selected because she was unmarried and single; meaning that nobody would miss her if Harry's temper surfaced, and she'd had success getting through to him in the past.

She knocked gently on the door, careful not to knock too loudly since she knew the children were sleeping. Kreacher opened the door, widening his mouth in a twisted gnarl that was his version of a smile. "Hello, moonchild," he said, using his nickname for her. "How may Kreacher be of service to you?" Of all Harry's friends, Kreacher only really liked Luna, though he tolerated the rest.

"Is your master awake?" she asked kindly. "I would very much like to see him." The Wrackspurt infestation that surrounded the Potter cottage was overwhelming. She needed to get started on it right away.

Kreacher's smiled drooped. "Master is not himselves," the house elf confessed, flinching a bit as he realized he was telling his master's secrets but continuing anyway. "Master won't eat Kreacher's food. Master not leave the house. He only ask Kreacher to bring him more drink at night."

"What about the children?" Luna inquired, a dent forming in her forehead. This was much worse than she had thought.

"Master spend the days with them," Kreacher answered. "They make him better. Master only drink at night. Little masters ask where mistress is; they don't understand. Little mistress be a very fine child, very easy to manage. Kreacher help his master, yes he does."

"Of course you do, Kreacher. I know you're doing a wonderful job," she stated. The house elf looked proud at the praise. "But I think Harry needs more help than just you can give him. I think he needs someone to talk to. Can I please come in?"

Kreacher looked thoughtful for a moment before nodding. He stepped aside, letting her past. "Help Master," he pleaded sincerely.

"I will," she promised. The house was dark, but there was a single light on that she followed until the darkness ended. Harry was sitting in the living room, an open Firewhiskey bottle in his hands. He looked horrible, his hair more disheveled than usual and dark bags under his eyes that accentuated just how blood-shot they were. He looked like a man on the brink of sanity. Luckily, Luna considered herself an expert in insanity.

"Harry," she said in a calm voice, not displaying a hint of judgment or sympathy. He wouldn't appreciate either right now.

He looked up and laughed, but it wasn't his usual laugh. It was broken and desperate. "Luna," he replied. "Kreacher let you in?" he guessed, dark amusement tinged in his voice. She nodded. "He's always liked you," he mused, taking another swing of the horrible liquid that was attracting Wrackspurts to his brain.

"He's worried about you," Luna stated quietly. "We're all worried about you. You don't answer your letters or any Floo calls. Hermione's stopped by multiple times and hasn't seen you once. We want to help you, Harry."

"I don't need anyone's help!" Harry yelled, dropping his Firewhiskey bottle on the floor. Luna didn't even flinch, taking a step forward towards him. This wasn't the Harry she knew, the one who was her friend and defender. This was another man, one who was lost and needed a life raft but didn't know how to grab on.

"Yes, you do," she said in a perfectly logical voice. "You have three children under the age of five. You are going to need help. You barely seem like you're functioning as it is. We'll all help: the Weasleys and Neville and me and the D.A. and Andromeda and everyone else who loves you."

For the first time, Harry didn't sound as angry as he did broken. "I…" He could barely get a word out. Luna understood why he had been doing what he was doing. He was protecting from more hurt, from more reminders that other people still had their wives and children their mothers, from having to deal with the grieving Weasleys and the public and everyone else who would seek something from him. It was time to hit Harry with a harsh truth. Those seemed to work with him in the past.

"It's so difficult for you that you think it's easy for everyone else," she informed him bluntly. "And it's not. But the way we'll get through it is together." She reached and grabbed his hand, squeezing it in the familiar way she had always done during their friendship. "Just let us help you, okay?"

Harry seemed to be absorbing her words. Slowly, he nodded, and she noticed happily that some of the Wrackspurts were starting to clear away from his head. The rest would take time, but they had plenty of that. "Yeah, okay," Harry agreed, standing up. "I'm going to go take a shower and try to sleep for a couple of hours? Would you check on the kids for me?"

Luna agreed amiably, and the two walked upstairs in companionable silence. Harry took a left towards his bedroom while Luna took a right towards where the children's rooms were. She peeked in on Albus and James first. The two boys still shared a boy, Albus unable to sleep at night without the comfort of his older brother's presence. As much as James teased Albus, he was also extremely protective of him, a trait that he denied and all the women in the family found adorable. They were both sleeping peacefully, but Albus must've had a bad dream at one point because the boys were sharing James's bed. Luna decided to let them be, but she pressed soft kisses to each boy's forehead before silently creeping out of their room.

Lily's nursery was painful for Luna to enter, having planned it with Ginny and painted the beautiful mural of angels on the walls as a surprise for her. She supposed that angels were especially fitting now since Ginny had become one. It gave her comfort to think that her friend was one of the angels on these walls now, watching over them all. Kreacher was minding the little baby, his twisted smile present. He turned to see Luna. "Little mistress be sleeping. Little mistress very good baby," he boasted.

Luna smiled. "Much better than the boys?" she asked innocently, knowing the mischief they caused Kreacher on a daily basis.

Kreacher scowled. "Kreacher be thinking little masters put him in early grave!" the house elf complained.

Luna laughed softly, careful not to wake her goddaughter. "Your master is currently showering and planning on trying to sleep," she informed the old elf.

Kreacher brightened considerably. "Kreacher knew moonchild would help!" he boasted. "Kreacher be in the kitchen. Master should eat."

"I'll let him know," Luna promised. The house elf popped away, leaving Luna alone with her goddaughter. She picked the baby up gently, careful not to wake her, and cradled her in her arms. Lily's face was so peaceful and beautiful and remarkably like Ginny's. The poor girl was lucky if her father and brothers let her out of their sight in the next century.

"Everything's going to be alright," she whispered to her tiny sleeping goddaughter. "Your mum has gone to heaven now, but she'll keep an eye on you from there. Your daddy's a great man, and you'll have two very over protective brothers. Don't worry though. You'll have me and your Grandma and Aunt Hermione and plenty of other aunts to turn to for advice about boys and all these things." She paused, brushing a thumb against the small baby's face.

"We're all going to be alright," she promised. As if accepting her godmother's promise, Lily Luna Potter made a slight cooing noise.

Somewhere far away, a red haired woman looked down at the scene through the clouds. She ached to be there with her baby, her husband, and her little boys and her heart broke to see Harry hurt so much. Luckily, her best friend was going to be taking care of them now.

"Thank you, Luna," she whispered. Somehow, Ginny knew the message would reach Luna.

Back on Earth, Luna smiled at her mural, Lily safely sleeping in her crib. Yes, everything was going to be just fine…


End file.
